scraggay:

I C ANT BREAHTE MY GRANDMA HAS ALZHEIMERS AND JUST SAID TO MY PREGNANT SISTER “DAMN YOU GOT FAT” OMG

(Source: growlithed)

internetmessiah:

Hello, 911? *twirls phone cord around finger* sooooo how was your day? Did you arrest any bad guys?…No you hang up first! Hello? 911?